Beats 1 (Nov. 2nd 2015)
Gwen Stefani
It’s great to see you, and congratulations on what I would say is taking one of the bravest steps of an artist this year - to put out a record as honest as you have, and to watch the way that people have reacted to it. And we wanted to catch up with you and see how you feel about that, because that’s a rare alchemy.
I don’t feel like it’s brave. It was just, it happened so fast and it was so, like, meant to be. It wasn’t like I was like, ‘I’m going to do this.’ It just happened, d’you know what I’m sayin’? So that’s what’s so kind of mind-blowing about the whole thing. I mean, I feel like I’ve been in a cocoon, like, just in a cocoon phase, and I’m ‘bout ready to bust out, you know what I mean. And it’s going to be really colorful and it’s going to be, like, it’s about ready to get good around here, d’you know what I’m saying, like -
We missed it.
Oh my god, imagine how I felt. Imagine what it was like for me.
You must have seen that, even thinking - I mean, I’m just thinking of the pinpoints in the journey of moments when that’s become very evident even to you, like, that performance with Pharrell at Coachella when you came out.
Oh my god. Don’t - This is going to be so intense, because that was a really huge turning point. I mean, I’ve been on a crazy journey, you know what I mean. Like I could just break it down from like, you know, getting pregnant with the first baby and doing the Love.Angel.Music.Baby. record and going around the world, and, you know, that first departure from being with the band. And then getting off of 120 shows of a tour from The Sweet Escape tour and then getting pregnant that month with Zuma. And then going back on tour with No Doubt when I was like, he was only eight months old. Nursing him, like, doing that show. Like it was just so non-stop. Incredible, but there’s only so much energy you can give, you know, to be a wife, to be an artist, and a mom. Like all at one time. It started to get out of control for me, and I think after that No Doubt tour, things started to, like, shut down for me. It was just really a hard time. And that was like a while ago now, so that whole period has been just not my favorite part of my life. But I just keep thinking, like, when you are alive in this world - For me, cos I have this extraordinary life, like who am I? Like I literally am a normal girl from Orange County. The fact that I’m standing here and you care to talk to me, like I don’t even understand. Like I don’t even understand how this happened to me, d’you know what I mean. And so it’s just mind-blowing, but I know that there’s, like, this crazy thing where I was given this gift - which I didn’t know about until it happened - that I can write these songs. But I’m always like so not confident about it and like worried about it and like writer’s block and all these things. And I was like that. I was blocked for so long.
Making that last No Doubt record was so hard, like knocking my head against the wall. You know, when you are writing, I feel like what happens is is just really clear. Like you write something and you’re like, ‘Oh, that’s really good.’ And that’s a verse, you know what I mean. Or ‘This is what I’m feeling.’ It just happens, you know. Well, that wasn’t happening. At all. But now - My point is is that it’s happening again. And it’s like the most incredible thing ever. Like it’s so incredible to be to a point where I get to use my gift again and be confident and grateful and considerate about it, and - And now, really weirdly, by Used To Love You coming out unexpectedly - totally unexpectedly - to feel the energy of the people that have, like, received it. But it’s crazy because I think that my, like, life obviously went - Everybody knows my life’s in crazy turmoil. And I went in to write a song with this guy, Rick Knowles, who did the whole Lana Del Rey record and he’s like a real songwriter songwriter. I hadn’t done that in a long time cos songwriting, you can write to tracks or you can go on a guitar or a piano or, you know. I walked in the room and he was like, “Okay. You’re going to sit right here in the middle of this room and there’s an engineer you don’t know and you don’t know me, let’s go. And by the way, when Lana Del Rey comes in here, she just whips them out in like ten minutes.” I’m like, Oh my god! Like what is happening right now?
Wow.
It wasn’t like that but for me, cos I was so intimidated and scared and going through so much - And I was like, “Okay.” Like I’ve done this before, a lot of times, so... We did write a song that day and it just was like the first taste of, like, okay, wait a minute, I know this feeling, this is what I’ve gotta do now. It wasn’t like, ‘Oh, I wanna do that. I wish I could do it.’ It was like, ‘No, this is what’s happening now and this is what you’re gonna do.’
No distractions, do you think as well? Cos it’s easy, I think, when you’re so busy and successful and you have so many creative outlets - whether it’s a fashion line or whether it’s your work in telly or your work in film or even your work on your records with No Doubt. I mean, you live a full life.
I have a really full life. But I wasn’t even planning, like, on really - I wanted to make a record, but... Let’s rewind. So I got pregnant with Apollo, which was like a miracle. I mean, I never was planning that or expecting it. It was literally a miracle. That was my first sign of, like, Wow, like, I’m going to start exercising this spiritual side of me, because that is a miracle. That was right in front of my face, you know. And then you were talking about Pharrell. And I had the baby, and I wanna say it was like four or five weeks after giving birth, his Happy song was like going crazy. And my kids were like going crazy over him and I’m like, “But I know him, you guys! I know Pharrell.” And they’re like, “Really?”
Cool points.
I was like, “Look on the internet! Look, I have pictures with him.” And they would be like, “Woah, was that your boyfriend?” And I was like, “No, it wasn’t. We wrote a bunch of songs together.” Cos they didn’t know any of my songs, y’know. So just to get points with them - And Kingston was pissed. He was like, “Why am I not in the video? The whole world’s in the video! Why can I not be in the video?” I was like, “Well, the video’s done, first of all. And you didn’t get invited and you can’t just be in somebody’s video if you want.” So I said, “Well, we can make him a video ourselves and send it to him, cos I have his e-mail.”
Oh, stop with the - You’re like the coolest mum in the world right now!
No, no, because he is my friend! And I’ve done a lot with Pharrell. But it’s not like we’re homies like we hang like that, d’you know what I mean. So it was like a lot for me to write him, but I just was like, ‘I gotta do this for - ’ You know, people do anything for their kids so. We made a video and they’re dancing in the kitchen and I sent it to him, and he wrote me back. He’s like, “Oh my god, I can’t believe it.” Cos he’s so grateful. To watch him go through his kind of dry spell and then to have all this success again. He’s just an incredible person. So then he wrote me saying, “Hey, I’m doing Coachella. You think you’d consider, like, coming out and doing Hollaback with me?” And I was like, I literally couldn’t sleep that night cos - I was like, ‘Well, maybe if I wore like a black jumpsuit, I could cover up the pouch of my stomach. Like maybe I could pull it off.’ And I got so fired up, you know what I mean, cos I was just like, I had been pregnant for all that time and then before that, things were not good, so. I was ready for a change, you know what I mean.
Yeah.
So the first time I left the house was to get on a tour bus with my kids, drive to Coachella, get off the tour bus, walk onstage to sing that song with Pharrell.
Woah.
Yeah. So it was kind of really intense for me. And Pharrell is like - I wanna say - A prophet means someone who’s giving you like, I don’t know, valuable information, right? Truth or whatever. And I consider him that for me. Like an angel. Cos the things that he said to me during that time were so motivational, he doesn’t even realize it. But he said some really amazing stuff to me, like about, “Wow, it’s time for you to go this way, Gwen.” And I was, like, “God, you’re so right.” And that’s where everything started to change. And then I got The Voice out of nowhere, like they just called me. I was like literally sitting in my - I had the baby and my lawyers over seeing the baby for the first time. I’d just given birth. And they were like, “Do you wanna do the show?” And I was like, 'Wow, my life is so weird.’ Like they just asked me to do The Voice cos Christina’s pregnant. And I was like, “Should I do it?” And I really wanted to, like, cos it just seemed so exciting to do something new and different. And then four or five weeks later, I was on the show. Like it was crazy. Then I found out Pharrell’s doing it. Like I didn’t even know he was going to do it.
You didn’t even know he was on the show at the time?
No. I was like, ‘There’s no way.’ Like he’s not going to do it. He wouldn’t do it. And then they’re like, “No, Pharrell’s doing to be on it with you.” Isn’t that crazy? Then all of a sudden we were, our lives like were entwined again.
You know, I look at where Pharrell’s at as like a 3.0 stage in his life, you know. Post-Happy and post-Get Lucky, everything else, like, oh man, we needed reminding how amazing he is. And then I think about where you’re at now and how, and I see this before we came in here. Whether you realise it or not, I think people have made a decision after hearing this record that it’s time for that 3.0 moment.
Oooh.
I think they have. I think they’re like, this is it. And you guys seem to be in parallel in that sense.
Well, he said that. Because he was saying, like, “I was where you were at, like, a year ago.” Cos I asked him. I was like, “How did you get - ” Cos his spirit was so alive, like he was literally lit up. I wanted some of that, y’know what I mean. And he was like, “I’m telling you, Gwen, I was at where you were at a year ago.” I feel like I was following right - He was helping me get to the next place. Anyway, so wrote Spark the Fire together and that was magical. And then I wanted to make a record together so bad but I knew I couldn’t do it, nursing a baby, doing the new show, like, the other kids. There was no way for me to write a record. And plus, at that point, I was so not confident about it. I was like, ‘I can’t write, I can’t write, I can’t write.’ So I started working with a producer and we just like started like, oh, I can curate a record. Like how all the girls do it. Like have a writing camp and, like, everybody just like, I’ll get things that are my vibe, y’know what I mean. I can do that. I’ve written a million songs, like, I don’t need to prove myself. So I tried that.
Can we stop there, please, and talk about that for a second. Cos the person that I know from No Doubt, from the very start all the way through your career -
I’m open to trying stuff.
One thing I don’t think about when I think about Gwen Stefani is that really open, everybody just come in and do it for you project. I don’t think that that’s you. Correct me if I’m wrong.
It wasn’t. But I was put in a position where I was just not desperate but I was, ‘Okay, I have these opportunities. I’m on the show. I haven’t had any new music in a long time. Why not?’ Like one of the favorite things I ever did was It’s My Life, which is a cover, y’know what I mean. Like I love doing that song live. And it even feels like part of me, y’know what I mean. So I’m not that much of an ego-maniac that I need to write the song. So then I did that project and it just never came out because it just never felt right.
Who was on it? Who did you work with on it?
I worked with awesome people. Charli XCX. I worked with Sia. I worked with Benny Blanco, who’s awesome. It didn’t make me feel satisfied and it didn’t make me feel like me. I just felt fake.
Sounded dope but didn’t dig deep.
Yeah. It didn’t - Cos I guess my whole thing is to write those songs, y’know what I mean. Cos I
guess that’s my whole point being here, right? So -
Was it a tough decision, though, not putting that out?
No. I put the one single out, which was so weird because that song was, urn, Ryan Tedder. These are all like geniuses, by the way, that I got to work with.
Pause in this discussion about working with the world’s greatest songwriters which didn’t come out. It’s like, okay.
It’s true. I think the song was Baby, Don’t Cry. And I was like, “I can’t sing that.” I was like, I gotta turn this to Baby, Don’t Lie. But it was almost like predicting the future. Like I didn’t even know at that point that that song would actually be relevant in my life, like literally lyrically. The album doesn’t come out and everything’s crazy, and then, like, my life gets flipped up and just, like a tornado, like just -1 don’t even know how to describe it.
Yeah.
I think when you say ‘being brave’ to put the song out, the brave part was crying on the freeway, driving to Rick Knowles, somebody I don’t know, and going - even though I felt like all I wanted to do was be in bed and like stab myself in the face - like I went to write that first song. And that was proof enough that, again, that was the right direction. And then I started writing - I wrote a song with Linda Perry. We were doing all these No Doubt shows on the weekends, which were really intense. Cos I mean, I was going through so much and I was, like, I got on the plane and I’m like, ‘Noooo! I have to sit next to that guy. Like I’ll die. I’ll die.’ Like somebody I didn’t know. I was, cos I didn’t want to sit next to somebody for a long flight. Like what if he talks to me? So anyways, I just put my headphones on and I just started writing. And we went to New Orleans and it was this really crazy, like, spiritual weekend. Everything that I wrote in that session on the plane would end up being a song called Medicine Man, which I wrote with Linda Perry, who’s just - She is just such a cool, intuitive, like, again, soulful person, who has gone through so much that - You know, I spent a lot of time with her, like just talking.
So that was that and then we wrote, I think that was the song we wrote - And then the record company was like, “Okay, well, we want to put you in with these guys and we think this is a good idea.” This new A&R guy who I talked to on the phone, and I was like, ‘I think this guy might be smart.’ Like, ‘I think this guy actually gets me.’ But I didn’t trust him 100% but I was like, ‘Okay.’ So he puts me in the studio with this guy called J.R. and this guy called Justin Trantor and this girl called Raja. And I didn’t know - Like I walked in and I just said to them, I was like, “Listen. I don’t know who you guys are - ” I didn’t know what they did or who they were or anything. I was pissed. I was like, ‘I can’t believe I have to be surrounded by all these guys and they’re going to be like trying to see what I got,’ you know what I mean. And I walked in and I was like, “I just want to be clear. I don’t want to make hits. I don’t care about anything except for the truth and being real and using my gift. I don’t care. I’m going to do it. I’m not going to be shy about it. I’m going to be confident.” And that’s the first thing I said to them and they were just like .... And then J.R.’s like, he’s a character, do you know what I mean, like paranoid, worried, crazy guy. And he’s like, “Well, I’m the producer. I do the music.”
Just establish what we do. I just imagine you coming in and just being like, “Here’s how it’s gonna go. Do it, do it, do it, do it.” And then there’s this quiet and they’re like this.
It was just so crazy. So then we literally walked over to the piano and, um, we wrote this, our first song, um, called Red Flag, which is just - I don’t know - I think it’s a work of art.
Hang on a minute. That’s three songs now that you’ve got. When you were in there -
Dude. I wrote twenty songs.
I don’t know what’s going on with an album. I don’t want to talk about -
No, no, I have a whole record. I wrote a whole record in eight weeks.
It’s ready?!
Yeah. But I wanna keep writing. So. Cos I feel like I’m channeling right now, like if this is my time to be able to channel and have this - Cos I don’t feel responsible for any of this music. I just, it’s just coming to me. And I’ve just been asking for it and been open to it and working on it in the sense of, like -
It’s come to help you again.
Yeah, like -
It’s come to help you again.
It’s been incredible. So that was the first song we wrote. And then we wrote this song called Naughty, and that was the second song we wrote. And I couldn’t believe it, because we wrote them, like, two days in a row. And every single time I’ve gone in the studio with those guys, I’ve written a song, if not two, in one day. Like it was insane. Like you have to understand how much I couldn’t write, and then all of a sudden I’m writing, writing, writing. And Justin is kind of like, I feel like, my wingman. And he weirdly is like a stalker of me, like he wanted to work with me for like two years and they were saying, ‘No, no, no. You can’t work with her, you can’t work with her.’And then he also like knew all, he knows everything I’ve ever done. So he’s like, he grew up on me. So its just really weird to be in the studio with this guy, cos we’re so connected but yet the history is like this weird history.
Does it ever get creepy? Does he ever say things about stuff you’ve forgotten, and he’s like, ‘Oh, in 1999 when -
Oh, he totally knows stuff. He’ll be like, “Oh, yeah, the necklace that you wore in....” And I’ll be like, “What are you talking about!? Get security.”
“I have it on my phone! It’s here on my special folder.”
But it’s just been like a weird, crazy chemistry. Quite spiritual and we would do lots of prayer circles and just be like asking for the right, to do things for the right reasons. Cos music is so powerful and it’s so, like, you know, my kids, like my one-and-a-half-year old, he loves music and he doesn’t know. It’s just a gift that we’re given on the planet, y’know what I’m saying. That’s what I think. I’m not going to go into all the details, cos I don’t even need to say what is going down cos everybody knows that my whole life is blown up, so. Meanwhile my whole life’s blown up and I’m just doing the studio when I can, because obviously I’m so busy. I have the kids and like whenever I could, I would just go to the studio. It got to the point where when I would go into that room, J.R.’s studio, the smell, I was like, ‘Oh my god, I love this smell.’ It was my sanctuary, you know. And I was doing all these rehearsals cos I had to - I was doing the No Doubt rehearsals because we were doing weekend shows, which were mind-blowing.
Cos when you’re like in a state like I am, to actually get up onstage and like feel the energy of everybody that kind of knows what’s happening and knows all the music I’ve already written and knows my story, the energy, the love, that I was getting was just crazy. Crazy exchange of love, like it’s insane. I could cry about it right now. I’m not going to cry, though. And so anyway, I was at rehearsals and they were like, “Okay, we’ve got to have some kind of - ” Cos The Voice was coming up. “Maybe we should get a song, y’know, we have all these songs. Should we release a single or not release a single?” And they called me, the record company, and we had a big conference call. And I was so happy that day cos I was in rehearsals and sometimes you go into this place of like, no-one’s watching, you’re in a rehearsal. I get into really into it. I was like really happy. I get on the phone and they were like, “Well, we really think that no-one’s going to really relate to this record. It’s too personal and we think you should just put - We just don’t think about a single. Just think about putting out an artistic body of work.” And I was just like, ‘Oh my god.’ I was - They just punched me in the stomach, like, I literally lost all my breath. This was the most honest, like, amazing miracle of music that’s ever happened, y’know what I mean.
What were they worried about?
I don’t know. I just think they’re just awesome. They’re so awesome. They’re all my friends -
And you work with them to give you an opinion and -
Yeah, and it’s just, look, I’ve had a really long career, like, I don’t expect for radio, you know what I mean. I don’t - And that’s not why I’m doing it, you know. But it still hurt me. I still was like, “Ughhh.” So the next day, I went into the studio and I told the guys kind of what was going on, and I was like, “Okay, so let’s go write a song.” Like let’s write the most non-commercial, personal shit that I’ve ever written in my life. And I wrote Used To Love You. The next day, so first time in twenty-five years, they called me, the record company, and they’re like, “We think the song’s a big song.” I was like, no-one’s ever told me I had a hit. Ever. It’s always like, “Well, we’ll try it. We’ll dribble it out. We’ll see.” You know what I mean. “We don’t know.” Every time it’s like nobody thinks it’s gonna be - Cos everybody’s worried. Cos it’s scary, you know.
Nobody knows.
And that was actually the first time I started writing with a new girl, this girl Julia. I think what she was there for was cos she’s literally so gifted, like, I don’t even understand how she can come up with these catchy melodies. And she hates everything. So she’s kind of like the hate meter, so you just know that, like, you have to bring it to a certain level -
I have a friend like that.
If she likes it, then you - So I realized that that’s what she was there for for me, to make me bring it, y’know what I mean.
What’s her face like when you do something she doesn’t like? Is it really just -
I don’t know. I love her so much. I love her so much.
That was perfect.
But it’s like -
Not even mad, just disappointed.
It’s just interesting, too, because it was scary because I’d already written like, I feel like, fifteen, maybe, songs with Raja and those guys. And then I didn’t - I felt weird bringing in somebody new. But it was time to like mix it up. She came in with J.R. and we did a bunch of songs together. We did I don’t know how many songs at that point. Um, it’s so crazy because then Justin’s like, “Well, we should work with Mattman and Robin,” who are these Swedish producers that work with Max Martin. And like I always wanted to work with him because it’s like, for a songwriter, like you just want to know what’s going on. Like how do you do that?
Cos no-one knows. It’s such a closed door experience, that, right?
Oh my god. And they never would let me because why would I get to do that, y’know? So anyways
That I find very hard to believe.
Okay. But -
Is that real?
Because these people are in demand. And it’s all about, y’know, whoever’s hot right now, right that second, y’know what I mean. But it happened and I wrote like two more songs that they think are singles, and then I wrote two more songs. Like it was crazy. So like I literally probably have like twenty-five songs.
The minute that you put Used To Love You out and you started seeing the reaction that you got and the way that people were responding to it, because people respond to honesty. We live in this world now where there’s so many guards and so many protective layers. The real honesty is a song like that, right? That’s - When people hear that, it affects people.
Well, what’s weird about this song is that the day after, you know, haha, it’s hard to not say, but the day after things went down - let’s put it to you that way - I wrote that line: “I don’t know why I cry”. But I just wrote it down, I wrote it. Instead of just -1 would write things. Instead of just, like, going online and looking at stupid stuff, I would be like, okay, I need to look at my spiritual side, like I need to write, I need to research, I need to be inspired. I was really working on, like - Everybody keeps asking me, like, “Ooh, how are you keeping in shape?” And I’m like, “I’m not keeping this body in shape. I’m working on this brain right now, this mind, this spirit.” That’s all I’ve been doing. I had to. I was put into a position where I was on my hands and knees, like, just praying, just hoping for some kind of like something.
Anyway, so I wrote, that was like written the day after, that morning after, that line, exactly that chorus, exactly the chorus. I don’t even really remember and so it wasn’t until a few months later that I went back in when we went in that day and wrote Used To Love You, and I found it in there. I read it to Justin and he was like, “Oh my god.” So then they helped me to fit it into the melody. It is really real. I mean, it’s interesting and it’s very healing, because it got me to a point where it’s like that song basically is about forgiveness, I think, and I think that’s where I needed to get to that point. And, um, it’s really crazy too because - So I had this opportunity to work with Mastercard, right, which is, again, like, a miracle.
Producer or - I’m just joking.
Ha! Well, actually, that would be a good name for a producer, right? Um, but they wanted - Part of the thing was that I had to do these shows. I was like, I don’t have a band, I haven’t played these songs in eight years, y’know. So I did a show like last January, like the weekend before my life blew up in my face. And the idea was, “Well, this is gonna be the single, why don’t you play it live?” And I was so excited about it. I was like, ‘Oh, god. I can’t believe I get to do a new song.’ Like we played it in rehearsals and it’s such a magical song, like, and so we got there and, um, my girlfriend Sophie Muller, who’s one of my best friends - she’s English and she’s done all my videos
Incredible. Incredible director.
She’s literally a genius. And also the one person who has - Like I would definitely be dead right now if it wasn’t for her. Like she saved me. Like she was there on Skype, everything, for me. And, um, we’re like, ‘What should we do this for this song for the screens behind it?’ Cos we knew people would be filming, y’know what I mean, and we just couldn’t think of a video, and we couldn’t think of an idea. And she woke up in the morning and she was like, “I know what it should be. I want you to just like - I’m just going to film you just, like, thinking about the song.” I was like, “Okay.” It’s craziness trying to get this show together, y’know, like rehearsals are exhausting - new band, new dancers, like. It was like Friday night and the show was going to be on Saturday. We had to film this thing, and we had no time and they were like - we were in the dressing room - “Okay, you’ve got to be done in thirty minutes.” Cos otherwise it goes into like ten grand every five minutes you’re in this room, like you know what it’s like in New York and you’ve got to get out of the dressing room.
And so I rehearsed all day. I was all sweaty and disgusting and, like, same hair, and the guy just fixes my make-up - You know, other stuff went down, crazy stuff went down, like personal stuff went down. I don’t even want to say it, but I’ll just give you a hint. Like right after that happened, I sat in front of the camera and did the performance that you saw, which is - The first performance was just crying and the second performance was crying and the third performance was messed up hair and that fourth one was the one that ended up being the one. We left and we went back and watched it and we were like, “Woah, this is crazy.” We were like, “Maybe this should be the video.” And so then I performed the song on Saturday night and it literally was like incredible. Afterward we went to a bar and, like, having champagne and eating pizza and going, “Woah, this is crazy.” Because the response was like they knew everything. From that. Like it was the truth and they could, like, feel it. It was so weird. The truth is so powerful, y’know what I mean.
We all hide from it, man. Cos we’re scared. It’s a vulnerability thing. But when you have the courage to put it out there, when you’re going through what you’re going through, that’s what’s great about art. You’ve done it before. You’ve given us this honesty before.
Wanna know something that’s even crazier about all this? And I hate saying this but I will because I don’t care. The week that that song came out was the twenty year anniversary of Tragic Kingdom. I mean, how is that possible? It’s the same week. And then when I got - So this is the rest of the story! So I get home from New York and it’s Monday and they’re like - Cos I didn’t know the single was going to come out. They didn’t go, “Oh, next week.” I didn’t know for like a month. We didn’t know when the single was going to come out. They just were all of a sudden like, “We’re doing it next week.” And this was like on Saturday. So I wanna say, like, Friday, they were kind of like talking about it, saying you should do the single at the show, and then it’s gonna come out. Like it was really spontaneous. So I had an appointment. I got in the car, turned the radio on; it’s on. And I filmed myself - Cos I turned my phone on. Not to post it. Because I was gonna show my friend, cos I was like, ‘Okay! This is happening right now. Like I’m on the radio.’And then afterward, they started to talk about me and it was so surreal, like, oh my god. Then the song went to iTunes that night at like nine o’clock and then it went to Number 2 like within twenty-four hours. So it was crazy.
This whole journey that you’ve been on, and, man, your honesty’s been amazing today. It’s been so good, I think, for fans to be able to listen to where you’ve been.
I don’t care, you know. I really have never been the kind of person -1 don’t have anything to hide. I mean, the only thing I need to protect are my kids and, you know, besides that, I’m just a human being that goes through all the same stuff that everybody else goes through, if not even more extreme because of my situation is so weird.
Getting back to the first thing I said to you in this interview, when I talked about that Coachella performance of Hollaback -
Yeah, you’re the one who said that!
When you came out on that stage, you could see it. There was like 50,000 cameraphones and kids went batshit crazy. And the reason for that is that -
Were you there?
I wasn’t at that one but I was watching it online. So I was watching the stream of it and when he came out and was like, “I’ve got another guest,” and it was *does beat for Hollaback Girl* You just saw everybody, like - It was like the crowd levitated an extra four feet. It was like everybody just went up higher. And it’s because I think when you come out and you say things like, “Man, I was in the worst place for awhile. I wasn’t confident, I wasn’t writing, I wasn’t in that place,” I think it makes people feel like they’re not alone. Like it’s okay.
Of course - It’s a journey that we’re on. There’s a reason, there’s a purpose, there’s, like, a job to do while we’re here. And, you know, you get lost along the way, of course you do, cos we’re human beings. For me, I just wanted to start, like, listening again and being, like, just surrendering myself to whatever it is that I’m supposed to be doing, y’know. And just trying to be a good person and like praying for my gift. Because that is the one thing - When I discovered that I could write a song - I was nothing before I could write a song. I was just like a passive girl in love with my boyfriend, like, going to college, didn’t know what was going to happen, like really bad at school, like really unfocused.
And then he dumped me and I was, like, wrote the song. Didn’t even know I could write, you know what I mean. And I just kept writing. I never knew anyone would ever hear any of that music, because we’d been a band for nine years and we were like not failures but, like, we weren’t going to have commercial success. We were in the middle of Nirvana at that point. Where did we fit in? We don’t. And we never were going to. So the fact that that actually happened is surreal. But that record was written over a three-year period, and then it came out, and then I had to sit with Tony for two-and-a-half years on tour -
Singing the song every night.
You know what I mean. Like two-and-a-half years of talking about it.
Answering questions every day.
Yeah. So it was drawn out over a five year period, y’know what I mean. Or a five-and-a-half year period. And this happened a few weeks ago when I wrote this. That’s what’s kind of incredible. Like I feel so blessed that I get to live in both worlds, where music now is so fast and so, like, accessible, and you have so much access to people and what they think and what they want. I mean, it’s intimidating but it’s also like incredible to have, like, to have that - Before, we were like, “Okay, let’s get in the Nissan. Everybody fit in, let’s go to the PO Box and get our fanmail.” And then there’d be like the one that’s like the mean letter and you’d be like, “Oh, god, what do we write to them?” It’s been a really incredible time. And then, on top of that, I get to be back on The Voice.
Can I be so bold as to say, would there be a time when an album, a tour, things like that, you know, would you commit to that for a time? Would you step away from the other stuff?
Oh, well, you know, The Voice thing is just one season at a time. Like I don’t know if I’ll ever do it again. Like I hope I would. What I got out of The Voice - A lot of what I got out of The Voice the first season I did it was so unexpected. I don’t know if I would have all this music if it wasn’t for that. Because being around the other coaches, being in a position where you’re actually not - I mean, let’s face it, like, being a lead singer in a band since you’re like seventeen years old, it’s pretty self- centered, y’know what I mean. You get a lot of attention and it’s all about me. This is what I brought today, I don’t even have keys, I don’t have anything. Like I’m like a kid, y’know what I mean.
Yeah.
So the only, only reason not to tour for me is just how do I do it? How do I put three crazy boys onto a tourbus and like go, like -1 don’t know what that means. I would - What I loved was we did these No Doubt concerts, like all these festivals, and every weekend, we were doing them. That was so awesome. Like Mom for five days, rockstar for like two days.
Rockstar for a weekend.
It was so great. It was so perfect, the balance. But if I could do something like that or, you know, I dunno. Obviously, obviously I’m going to just take it one day at a time. Like right now I’m just literally trying to understand just how lucky I am. And how grateful I am to be in this place. I just want to keep writing and then playing live is going to be probably, probably the next step, but I dunno. I’m really all about not trying to predict or control the future, because I know that I can’t. Like right now, today, right now, how awesome is this? Like you know what I mean? I just feel right now, in the moment. But yes, it would be a dream to be able to do something. And I have a whole show ready, because I had to do this whole show -
You just did it.
- for one show in New York.
You’ve got a crew sitting right there looking at their watch. An album next year, would you
like to put one out?
Yeah, yeah. I definitely do. And I think I have enough for probably two albums, like, if I keep - I’ll have to write a few more songs. Cos I kind of feel like I may as well keep going while it’s there. I have a lot of really - The second half of writing, like, urn, is quite joyful. People are going to be, I think people are going to be surprised cos the record - The first half was, like, dark but sarcastic and funny. There was a real sense of humor to it. I think I wasn’t really ready to, like, be serious about it, because it was just so bad that I just had to like, I just had to laugh, y’know what I mean. And then it kind of got serious. And then it’s kind of got joyful. It’s really weird, because when you write a record in such a short amount of time - which I’ve never done, ever. Cos you hear about, “Oh, that record was made in this many weeks,” or whatever, I would be like, “There’s no way!” Like No Doubt, for us to write one song -
We all know that. That’s common knowledge. C’mon, man. We all know how long it takes you to make a record.
So long. It’s really cool to do it so quick. And also just be confident that I know every time I’m going to go in, it’s gonna happen. Like literally before your eyes, you have nothing, zero, nothing, zero. And I’ll just, like, look through my phone, voice notes of, like, things like I had this one feeling, this idea. And then Justin’II be like, “I love that.” And then I’ll be like, “Really?” You know. Like there’s a song that we wrote called - I feel like it could be - if I release another single - it could be the - It’s called Misery. And, um -
Party time.
It’s actually a really happy song.
Okay, good.
I might have to change the title. But, um, we had written another song that day, or the day before, yeah, the day before. We were losing our minds. It’s called, um, Make Me Like You. And we couldn’t believe it. We were like, “How did we even write this song, it’s so good.” And we came back the next day and I had this thing, like I had the idea for Misery. I feel like the song was - and you can ask Justin the proof or anyone else you want to - written in twenty minutes. It’s like literally just happened. And everyone was like, “How did this happen right now!?”
I always think, if you can walk in the room with nothing and walk out with something that you love when you’re done, it’s a good day.
That is drugs right there.
It’s a good day, right?
That is literally drugs.
Especially if you get that monitor mix just right so then - Oh, that’s -
And they all hate me because I’ll be like, “How many hours til you think you can send me a rough mix?”
Standard question.
“Because I literally will kill, I will die if I don’t have it within the next four hours.”
Four hours!? You’re lenient. Everyone I’ve worked with is, like, “Dude, I need that file on my email in mp3 within five minutes.”
You know what they do, though? Cos a lot of times they can’t bounce it down. It takes hours to do what they have to do technically. I don’t know how it works. So what I would do is just take my phone and right by the speaker, just voice message. And then I’ll be listening to that and it’s like really tinny. And I like have it on really loud and it’s like really tinny but I can’t help listening to it still.
That’s awesome, though. That’s awesome. Listen, we’re excited. I mean, you came in here today and I really had one song.
I wish I could play you more, but -
Now we can’t wait. But I mean, we had this one song and we had a few songs from last year. Wasn’t really sure where they fit. And we had The Voice is coming back. And that’s kind of all we had. We knew we had the song and everyone loved it, and it’s like, it just felt like this was a good time to catch up, and I’m so glad we did.
Me too.
Because look at all the information we have now.
How much better do I feel. I was - Do you know what kind of mood I was in when I got here? I’m such a faker, right?
Yeah, you were fine when you walked in. Is your straight face that good?
I’m really good now, thank you. I had to get that off my chest.