The Howard Stern Show (July 21st 2016)
Gwen Stefani
[edited version]
Howard: Don’t you think it’s been an incredible - I mean, unfortunately in your personal life, you had a divorce, but hasn’t it been an incredible storyline for The Voice that you and Blake now are like the hot couple?
Gwen: Honestly, just like I can’t believe I’m sitting here right now, this is part - This whole year has, I don’t, the whole - Yeah, it’s been a year.
H: Has it been a year since the divorce?
G: Well, it’s been about a year and a half since - I found out about everything February 9th, um, last year -
Robin: Not last February but the February before.
G: Yeah, yeah.
H: I don’t know how you recover from any of that stuff, and all compressed in a year. Did you think you were just gonna take a breather from men? You probably weren’t looking for -
G: Oh my god. Are you kidding me, like? I never - I didn’t know what I was going to do. I was in a panic. I was like, I was in hell. I was in my hell of my life.
H: Of course. You got three young kids.
G: And I was going back to The Voice in the middle of it with this big huge secret, you know what I’m saying, like, so - And, you know, it was just one of those things where I just, I didn’t want anyone to know what was going on with me, like I didn’t know - I didn’t want to rush anything in my mind. I wanted to try and figure everything out, you know what I’m saying, so.
H: Who do you go to to figure all that out with?
G: With my parents and, um, God.
H: God, right. You pray a lot, right?
G: I prayed a lot, and I feel like, you know, I feel really grateful, you know, when you have like really bad things happen to you, sometimes that, I feel like that’s a little bit of an awakening. And now I feel so awake, you know what I mean. And Pharrell was like a really good friend to me as well, and just pointing me in the right direction and helping me wake up spiritually.
H: Did you every try to work it out even? Like I know - I have friends of mine who’ve personally gone through hell, as bad a situation as you went through, and sometimes they can work it out.
G: Did you try and work it out?
H: We tried for a long time but, uh, you know -
G: Cos you guys were - We were about the same together, like what, twenty-three years?
H: Twenty - My first marriage was - I met my wife when I was nineteen so, you know, twenty-five years together. It’s mindblowing when you can’t work it out. And you have young kids, forget it. And it’s hard on your kids, the whole thing. That’s why I’m sayin’, Blake, that devil, he worked his way in there -
G: No.
H: - he’s awesome.
G: You know what, you know what it was?
H: I would’ve swooped right in on you. As soon as I heard about it, I would’ve -
G: It wasn’t like that at all.
H: - the next day.
G: It literally wasn’t like that. It was like - The day that I -
H: Forgive me. I see opportunity -
R: He’s on the phone.
H: I’m on the phone. “Hey, uh, look, I think I can help out -
G: It was the most unlikely situation to ever happen.
H: “If you need a shoulder to cry on, please. Come over to my place, have some dinner - ”
G: You’re so stupid.
H: Why not, though? How great would’ve it been. I mean, I would’ve gotten dressed - If I was on The Voice with you, I would’ve spun around in my sexiest John Varvatos outfit, forget about it.
G: *laughs*
H: “I’m here!” But, uh, how the hell did romance develop? I mean, you probably were resistant.
G: I think that when I got there, um, the day that I got back to The Voice, so this is like July, I think, is the day I got back.
H: I love romance, by the way.
G: *laughs*
H: I do. I love a story like this.
G: But I -
R: But this is really interesting cos you already knew Blake and there was -
H: Right. You were friends.
G: I didn’t - No, you’re wrong. I didn’t know Blake.
R: You didn’t know Blake.
G: The show, how it works is, I’m in hair and make-up for about 400 hours.
H: Putting you together.
G: Yeah. And we all have separate trailers and we’re all in a compound like in the same room but in trailers. Nobody goes into each other’s room and nobody talks to each other until -
H: Because you’re miserable.
G: Nooooo. You’re crazy.
H: Oh please. I was on America’s Got Talent. Let me tell you, no one came near me. I just said, “I’ll do the job but don’t fuck with me during the breaks.”
G: I would - And also I had a brand new baby, so I basically, like, nobody - We would talk when we would get in front of the cameras. Like, okay, it’s time to go and we’re going in front of the cameras and then we’re going to do the blind auditions and then in between sometimes we’d go up to each other’s chairs and we’d talk, but it’s like, we don’t -
H: I can attest to this, because I - Like Heidi Klum sat next to me. And she once said to me, “Hey, you meditate. I wanna come in and learn to meditate.” And I said, “You wanna come in my dressing room? That’s not gonna fucking happen.”
G: *laughs* Oh my god!
H: It’s like, we’ll talk to each other on the set. That’s when the magic happens. Oh, I was the worst. But it’s so true.
G: Yeah, there’s no time.
H: There’s no time.
G: There is no time. And those, you’re doing like fourteen hour days like trying to shoot and stuff. So I did not know him. But you get to know him on the set, because it’s like, he’s soooo funny and he’s so lovely. And I was actually, you know - And from the outside, he looks like, you know, so happy and, you know, all those things. But, um, when I came back to the show, I had this huge weight on me.
H: And nobody knew.
G: Nobody but my parents and, like, obviously everybody involved. And then we, like, we all sat down before we got to the blinds, because - With the producers, as you do right before you’re going to go out. And we were all on the couches. We were mic'd up and everything. And Blake’s like, “I gotta talk to you guys.” And he basically made his announcement.
H: About leaving Miranda, yeah.
G: Yeah. So that was like - I think I might’ve like went white and, like, I was in shock because it felt like he was exposing me, do you know what I’m sayin’?
H: Right, right.
G: And I was like -
H: Now it’s your turn!
G: You know. And I just couldn’t even get my head around it. And then it was during the blinds, during that time, he came up to my chair. It was the first time he’d ever walked to my chair, and he was like, “I’m sick from what - ” He was just like - And I never saw him, like, look so upset, d’you know what I’m saying? And then - So then I was like, “I gotta talk to you.” I wasn’t going to tell him anything but I just need to talk to you, you know. And then we ended up talking and, um -
H: And you revealed to him you were having your own problems.
G: Kind of, yeah. I didn’t - I mean, he basically told me what was going on with him, and then I was like, “Well, I can’t tell you everything but I’ll just say - ” You know. So then we just started this friendship, which was just unbelievable that God would put us in a position to have each other at that moment.
H: On The Voice no less.
G: In the same exact moment. I mean, his thing had been going on since January, mine since February.
H: Were you worried that it was a bad way to start a relationship in -
G: I wasn’t trying to start a relationship. I was just trying to not die, you know what I mean. I was trying to, like - There was no plan.
R: It was a support system.
G: It was just -
H: Would you call each other and talk on the phone when you felt low -
G: No.
H: No? At The Voice, you would just sit there and talk to one another?
G: No. We started - I think we just started, like, emailing, you know, here and there, and it just overtime and then -
H: I mean, you’re like thank god.
G: Cos I mean, we don’t - The Voice, people don’t understand, is all pre-taped. You only have like three days you’re together. He doesn’t even live in LA. *laughs* So, anyways, it was, um, it was an incredible gift to be able to have a friend -
H: But when it blossoms into a romance, you’re shocked, right? Because you’re like holy mackerel, this is like happening too fast. And it makes great music too.
G: Well, what’s crazy too is like, also, um, musically, like, to know somebody in such a different genre of music, it’s so -
H: And connect.
G: Yeah, like and he ended up writing a song that he sent to me, and then I wrote back to him on that song. So we get to actually write a song together, which is crazy. Let’s get into the next part, which is this record, which is like - I went from literally not being able to write anything to writing a whole record.
H: By the way, this record, your most recent record, when you think about it - This is what I heard and tell me if it’s true. You had already written a whole other solo record. This is after the No Doubt record. And then you trashed it.
G: Well -
H: Because it didn’t feel genuine to you.
G: I didn’t write it, that was what was wrong with it.
H: Ahhh.
G: Cos I had got The Voice, so I thought, ‘God, I gotta put something out.’ And weirdly, Adam Levine had asked me to be on a song that Sia had written, that I was maybe gonna cut. Cos I was like, ‘I’m open to like doing other peoples’ songs now, because I just had a baby. There’s no way for me to write a record. I’m not going to go on with No Doubt right now and -
H: And when you’re popular on The Voice, you go, ‘Hey, I may as well put out a record.’
G: I was looking at it like, I’ve proven myself as a writer. If someone sends me, like, a song as big as like Umbrella or, like, you know what I mean? Like I’ll do it. I’m ready. And I was trying to gather songs to do some music while I was on The Voice.
H: Was the Sia song not right for you?
G: Um, actually, I got the song - This is how crazy it is in this industry with the music. Like they’ll send you songs and then they’ll take them away from you and be like, “Oh no, Selena Gomez wants that one.” Or like they go -
H: Thank god you can write your own music!
G: Exactly.
H: Oh my god.
G: It’s crazy.
H: It’s that competitive.
G: Yeah.
H: Cos, like, if Ed Sheeran writes you a song, you better grab it quick, right?
G: Yes. And so, um, so anyways, I ended up doing a song with Adam, weirdly, um, and then I had all these songs that I was trying to make, like, this record. And I put out a song called Baby Don’t Lie, which used to be called Baby Don’t Cry, but I was like, ‘You know what? I feel like I relate - ’ This is before anything has happened or anything. It was just like a precursor to what was about to happen. And so I wrote a little bit on that song. I kinda tweaked it to make it my own. But it still didn’t feel right. And I think that, for me, my calling was not to do that. My calling was to just share my life and my story.
H: So did this new album come pouring out of you, because of -
G: Yeah.
H: - the divorce and also falling in love with Blake?
G: Yes.
H: Wow.
G: I literally was in - You know when you’re so bad that you almost can’t get out of bed kind of thing. And I knew that I was like, if I could just go to the studio, maybe I won’t feel like such a jerk.
H: Right. It’ll give you some purpose.
G: I just felt like such a loser, you know. And I just got myself up. I remember driving down - it’s making me cry now - but driving down, like, San Monica Boulevard, just crying my eyes, going, ‘What am I doing right now? I’m already torturing myself. I’m going in the studio with some guy I don’t know right now to write a song. I don’t even know how to write a song.’
H: And don’t you feel like, oh, why does someone else have so much power over me to make me cry? You feel so vulnerable, right?
G: I just felt like, why am I going to torture myself more when I’m already in hell. But I did it because -
H: When you sing - Finish that thought. When you said you did it because…
G: I did it because I felt like if I could do something creative and good, um, then maybe - Cos I kinda learned that with Tragic Kingdom, like, I thought - I had a horrible situation and something great came out of it. And I helped so many people with that record.
H: When I see you on TV singing Used To Love You, um, are you on the verge of - I mean, I don’t see how you sing that song and not think about how you used to love -
G: Every single song I sing, I think about the song that I’m singing, y’know what I mean?
H: You have to make that connection.
G: Yeah.
H: In other words, so every time you sing Used To Love You, it’s painful?
G: Yeah.
H: Well, it’s a great song. By the way, nobody’s ever written a song about me. But it’s a painful song, right? When I first heard it, I was like, ‘Wow, that’s pretty raw…’ You know.
G: Well, it’s just crazy because I had written - The record - I wrote one song that all of a sudden - It wasn’t on the record. It didn’t make it on the record. But it just showed me that I could do it. Like I went to the studio that day that I was telling about on Santa Monica, and it was the guy with the piano and he was like, “Okay, let’s go.” And I’m like, “What do you mean?” I’m not going to sit in the middle of the room right now. I don’t know you. And I wrote this song called ‘You Don’t Know Me.’ And it felt so good, like, to do it. And it was like -
H: It was ‘you don’t know me’ like, “Hey, you never really knew me.”
G: Yeah.
H: You’re saying that to your ex-husband, you’re saying, like, “Look, you don’t even know who I am.”
G: It’s basically, like, “How can you love me if you don’t know me? You don’t love me, obviously, so.”
H: And that reality hitting you like a ton of bricks has gotta be weird -
G: Yeah.
H: - when you realize, wow, I’ve been with someone but they don’t even really know me.
G: Yeah, it’s a really painful situation. That whole thing. But like then I ended up going into a few more sessions with other people that weren’t really like giving me that, like - It was like, “Yeah, we’re so excited to have you here! Let us write the song.” You know what I mean. And then I just started getting to a point where I was like, “I don’t care about this record. I don’t care about hits. I don’t care about anything but just using the gift that God gave me”, you know. “And respecting myself, cos I know that’s what I was given.” So I went in the studio. I had a session that was set up for me with this guy called Justin Tranter, um, Raja, and this guy J.R. And I walked in and I was really mad that I had to go, but I’d asked to go. And I walked in and I just said, “Listen - ” I didn’t know who they were. I just said, “I don’t care about anything except for just, I just wanna be real and get the truth out and just, like, you know…” So anyways, that day we wrote this song called Red Flag and that’s the first song that I wrote on this album. And that was like, it just came out and it was so magical, and it felt so good. It was like the room, the smell in the room. Like everything. It was like I couldn’t -
H: Couldn’t be better.
G: Everything - I needed to be in that room. And anytime I was outside of that room was hell.
H: It was lucky you had that release.
G: Yeah, so that’s when I just started -
H: Probably kept you sane.
G: Yeah. I started doing - And that session, those people, Justin and J.R. and, they were so supportive and so, like, um, they made me feel so confident about my ideas that once I just had that support, it just all came back. And it was just coming out. Like I was writing like two songs a day.
H: Wow.
G: And I think I wrote most of the record in eight weeks.
H: So heartbreak and huge emotional trauma do equal great songs, right? It’s weird. Like in a way - And then even finding love with Blake, and then you have -
G: Well, that was a new thing. That was interesting to be able to, um -
H: When did you play him, say, Make Me Love You, when did you play that for him? Like, uh -
G: The first song I wrote about him was a song called Obsessed. *laughs* And then I wrote a song called Splash. And then, um, after that I kind of went to a different producer -
H: When do you play that for him? Like, when you say to Blake, “Hey, I’ve written a song about our romance. I want you to hear it.”
G: Well, I’d been sending him some of the songs that I’d been writing over, like, that time period. Um. Everything happened really quickly too, y’know what I mean. So. It’s hard to say exactly. Um, I’d have to look at the calendar. But I just, like, whenever we would be in town - Cos we’d do like, you do the Blinds and you do the Knockouts and then you do the promo, so you have like these little, like, chunks of time when he’d be in town. And I would just like, I played it for him.
*plays Make Me Like You*
H: Finally somebody’s happy.
G: *laughs*
H: You know what I mean, like wow.
G: I know.
H: What happened to the sad part of the record? Wow.
G: You’re funny.
H: I only wish somebody would feel like this after I made love to her. I mean, my god. He’s gotta be on a bit of an ego trip.
G: *laughs*
R: Look at what I made her do.
H: Look. You’re like wooooo! Wow. That’s a man.
G: I mean, honestly, when we wrote this song, though -
H: Oh my god.
G: I was going in the studio with a new producer team.
H: I bet. I mean, my god, you’re like, man, I didn’t know it could be like this! Are we afraid of heartbreak again? Could that be holding you back a little bit? Seriously.
R: Holding her back from what?
H: From, you know, even from throwing yourself fully into the Blake relationship?
G: Oh my god. It’s like the Howard Stern, like -
H: Psychotherapy.
G: Yeah. Actually, thank you. I probably will somehow feel a bit better for coming to see you. And I’m so glad that I’m here.
H: I’m so glad you came. I mean, I kept you here for like almost two hours.
R: We’re never ending the show.
G: Everyone’s like, “We don’t wanna hear anymore about this story.”
H: Oh my god. We’ve talked about so much. First of all, you gotta go see Gwen Stefani on her This Is What The Truth Feels Like tour with, uh, special guest Eve. Are you still touring around with those, uh, chicks, the ones - I saw you backstage at Letterman once with, like, those Asian chicks. You know what I’m talking about? They were hot.
G: They are hot. Um, I have a whole new band and dancers and just everything is new and fresh.
H: You gotta keep making it new, right?
G: Yeah.
R: You’re sort of like that, like Prince used to change it up and be with different artists -
G: Yeah. I mean, I think for me, at this point, I just wanted to, um - I never thought I would be onstage live again ever. Ever. Ever. And I did do a bunch of shows with No Doubt last summer in the middle of the height of what was going on with me. They didn’t even know it was happening.
H: That’s a good idea.
G: It was crazy.
H: But maybe it is a good idea.
G: It was good. There was something about it that was good. It made me, I thought I was insane. But it, the shows were crazy good. And then -
H: Let me ask you something. I mean, answer me something. Do I detect a little Southern accent now that you’ve been hanging out with Blake?
R: You think?
H: There’s a little bit -
G: You know what? My whole life, people have said that, but it’s Southern Californian.
H: You’re becoming like a country person.
G: *laughs* I’m not.
H: Doesn’t he have some sort of ranch or something?
R: Like a log cabin or something.
H: Cos I’ve known Adam Levine a long time, and he’s said Blake’s a great guy, you know - even before you were going out with him - Blake’s the greatest guy, gotta go to his ranch and kill shit and -
G: He’s a great guy.
H: - do all kinds of crazy stuff, you know what I mean.
G: What did you just say?
H: You know, like animal hunting.
R: They shoot things.
G: You know, the thing is is that, um, it’s just like, it’s really fun to, um, be introduced to different cultures. And it is a completely different culture.
H: I wonder if you’ll become like, uh -
R: Like a mountain woman.
G: I don’t know what - This is my thing, my thing is, tell me if this is a good idea: live in the moment.
H: Yeah, why not.
G: For one time. Like not - I feel like that’s one of the things, spiritually, like - If you’re worrying about the past and you’re worrying about the future, how can I enjoy the blessing right here?
H: Holding your shotgun. I mean, you’re -
G: You’re crazy.
H: - gonna be a whole different woman.
R: Make your own butter.
H: Are you gonna churn your own butter? I picture you - I mean, like you’re using an outhouse now. I don’t know what’s going on over there. Yeah, he seems like a good guy. And the way you, when you go, ‘Whooo-oooo’, I’m like, wow. I think this lovemaking is incredible, that’s what I think is happening now. I think this is a big romance. But we gotta take it slow. Let’s see where it goes. Everybody just calm down with it, right.
G: *laughs* I know.
H: Absolutely. I mean, it’s wild. I can’t keep up with you. Alright, look -
R: You know what we never got to talk about was a lot about fashion. Because you still set tongues wagging whenever you hit the runway.
H: Me or Gwen? Oh, you’re talking Gwen. Yeah. I’m very into fashion myself.
R: Because you’ve been, you know - You really dial it up when you -
G: Thank you. I only loved - Even before anyone was, like, looking, or if anybody wasn’t looking, I would do the same thing. I just love it.
H: I remember when I first saw you win No Doubt and you came out in like a bra top and just like a skirt, I was like, Oh my god. And yours abs are sick, right. Rock solid.
G: Working on ‘em right now.
H: All that swimming, all that swimming. You look good.
G: Thank you.
H: I mean, there’s no doubt about it.
R: No doubt.
H: And you are in love. You know how I know?
G: Why?
H: I looked you up on Twitter. Your picture on Twitter is Blake.
G: *laughs* Does that mean I’m in love?
H: C’mon.
G: Whatever Twitter picture you have.
H: Whenever you give over your Twitter account to somebody else’s picture, that’s a huge thing. Next, Facebook. Before you know it…. I wonder if you two will get married.
G: Oh my god!
R: She says she doesn’t want to go there.
H: If he proposes -
G: Oh my gosh!!!! I feel like I’m on the Howard Stern Show right now.
H: You are. Let me ask you - I’m gonna give you a theoretical. The relationship even grows more, and you become more and more close. Everybody’s cool. And we want to express our love in a new way.
G: *to Robin* How do you do this every day?
H: Listen to me, Gwen.
R: Oh, I just ignore him sometimes.
H: He gets down on one knee, and he says to you - on The Voice -
G: *laughs* On The - I love that!
H: There’s nothing more romantic.
G: *laughs and claps*
R: His chair spins round.
H: His chair spins round. I can see you punching him out if he did that. But let’s say he got down on one knee. And he said, “Gwen. I’m in love with you. I never want to be apart from you. You mean everything to me. Your sense of fashion, your sense of music - ”
G: *laughs*
H: “When I make love to you -
R: “I wanna write songs with you.”
H: “I wanna write songs. I wanna churn butter. I wanna have an outhouse with you. I want you to move to my farm. I want you to become a farmer’s wife.”
G: *laughs*
H: “Let’s do everything together. Will you marry me?” What would you say? Right now.
G: Oh my god!
H: Gwen.
G: Literally, not answering that.
H: Really? Wow.
G: Yeah.
H: Interesting.
G: Yeah.
H: That means yes.
G: *laughs*
H: I now pronounce you judge and judge.
G: *laughs*
H: Okay. It’s absolutely true. Alright, the big tour is -
R: You don’t even know - I mean, has he met the kids or - I mean, where are we in this relationship?
H: Of course he has. C’mon Robin, get with it. Tickets are on sale.
R: He might not have, Howard.
H: Well, listen. I’ve dated women with kids and no woman ever wanted me to meet their kids. They kept me away from them. I’m a bad influence. First of all, thank you for coming in.
G: Thank you.
H: That’s number one. Um, I’m so glad you came in.
G: Me too.
H: I’m a frightening person, I know.
G: You are super scary. But you’re actually not.
H: I’m not such a bad person. I tell people this. Um, Gwen Stefani. The big tour is This Is What The Truth Feels Like. In other words, she’s giving you the truth and you know what that means.
R: She always gives you the truth.
H: Giving you raw emotion. She’s talking about heartbreak but she’s also talking about love. Love. Deep love. You’re touring with special guest Eve, which is everyone is excited about. And tickets are on sale atLiveNation.com and you can go to gwenstefani.com for more information. I got it all out. I think you said a lot.
G: I feel like you did a really good job, Howard. Thank you.
H: I feel like I should charge you $400 for the therapy session, I really do.
G: You know, no problem.
H: I think you have your head on straight.
R: We’ll see what you said later today, I’m sure.
H: Yeah. Right.
G: Oh my god. Wow. Did I say anything bad?
R: No, no.
G: Okay.
H: And if Blake is listening, I’m gonna tell him, she’s a fabulous woman. You get down and propose.
G: *laughs*
R: This is him. He does love romance.
H: I love romance. And I’m a big proponent of marriage. I really am. I like -
G: How long have you been married now?
H: Um, since 2008, but we’ve been together for like sixteen, seventeen years.
G: Wow.
H: I really am in love with my wife, and I love our marriage. And, you know, we’re going to go off and raise cattle together like with you and Blake.
G: *laughs*
H: No, I really do. And I think that, uh, you can’t become bitter to the idea. I’m telling you, Gwen. It does work out. And he will propose, I know it.
G: *laughs*
H: And you will say yes.
G: You’re crazy.
H: Oh, I’m not.
G: Yes, you are. For sure.
H: I wanna be at the bridal shower.
G: *laughs*
R: The bridal shower!?
G: You’re crazy.
H: That’s right.
G: Woah.
H: And I want to be a groomsman.
G: You’re so ridiculous.
H: If I may. Or the maid of honor. I don’t care which.
R: I was gonna say, you should be a bridesmaid.
H: Right. Look at you, you’ve got tears in your eyes thinking about it.
G: No, I’m just - I was just having a flashback, thinking, ‘God, you know, everybody has their gift, and yours is to make people laugh.’ And that’s such a beautiful thing. And I’m so happy for you and -
H: And thank you for giving me so much time. And, uh, come back again and see us at some point.
G: Okay.
H: Alright. And the great Gwen Stefani. It was really great to have you here.
G: Thanks for having me.
H: I wish you luck with the tour. Don’t burn out. Pace yourself.
G: I am.
H: You know what I’m sayin’.
R: No more of that, you know, crazy cycle.
G: I know. Good point.
H: No more cycle.
G: Okay.